(True) Tales from the Crypt

Dramatis Personae

Jessie- that would be me.
Brad-an attractive male lifeguard, not his real name.
13 year old boy- in a semi-private lesson with his younger sister. Asked Jessie to be his girlfriend 2 weeks ago. Will remain nameless. See old entry.

Last week

Boy (randomly): "Jessie! I'm so glad you're my girlfriend"
Jessie: "I'm not your girlfriend."
Boy: "Oh snookums! Don't be silly. You better talk sweet to me or I won't buy you a gift for our anniversary!"

Boy:"Jessie, stop blowing kisses at me!"
Jessie:"I'm NOT blowing kisses at you!"
Boy: "You're not being a very good girlfriend."
Jessie: "I'm NOT your girlfriend!!!"

Boy (to Brad, the lifeguard): "See that swimming teacher? Jessie. She's my girlfriend!"
Jessie: "I'm NOT your girlfriend!!
Boy: "Tell me you love me!"
Jessie: "Back crawl, go!"

This week

Brad (unexpectedly, to boy): "Hey! You better leave my girlfriend alone!!"

Boy: "Jessie!! Is this true? You're cheating on me!"
Jessie (doesn't usually lie, but she is at her wits end): "Yes. It's true."
Boy: "I don't believe this!"
Other lifeguard: "Hey, Brad! Why don't you kiss your girlfriend?"

Brad pretends to kiss Jessie. Jessie giggles because she thinks Brad is cute and strong.

Boy: "Jessie, what do you see in him?"
Jessie: "We're not talking about this."
Boy: "Jessie, I just don't want you to get hurt. I'd never break your heart."
Jessie: "Front crawl, go!"

Brad: "Jessie, is this guy bothering you, again?"
Jessie (rubs Brad's back): "No, but thanks for checking, Brad!"

Boy: "He just fingered me! The lifeguard! Your boyfriend! He fingered me!!"
Jessie: "I don't think he fingered you..."
Boy: "Yes he did! You didn't see it!"

Jessie is ready to pull her hair out. She teaches the entire class-all 120 minutes of it (as it is a double lesson to make up for a missed class) out of the water.

Jessie wonders if she could actually date Brad. She doesn't think so.

The End