Chapter 7: Teleporting, True Love, and Text Messages

"Owww!" yelped Logan. "My heeeeead!" he moaned in a surprisingly high voice, that the girls later came to know as Logan's "pain voice". He claimed to have a "low pain tolerance".
"Wow," Megha thought to herself, "what a little whiner." She then convinced herself that she could be understanding.
Jessie, on the other hand, went on the offensive. She gathered herself together, straightened her slightly ruffled suit, and reached in her pocket. She pulled out her lighter (which was only used for concerts and to singe the ends of people's hair on long plane rides- she really didn't have a...problem) and flicked it on. It didn't work. She tried again, there. She held it up and surveyed the room, rather the cell. A traditional damp, stone cell with no windows and hay in the corners. She slowly turned on her heels and faced Logan. She peered into his face and started shouting, "LOGAN!! What is your problem!?!? Can't you follow simple directions? Do you know how much time our little saving-your-butt detour has wasted? Lorraine fricking Hodges, how hard is that?"
Megha silently marveled at Jessie's spectacular display of shifting the blame on Logan.
"Hmph, " Logan grunted.
"Ugh, " Jessie responded.

Then there was an awkward silence. The only thing that filled the silence was the clicking of a computer mouse somewhere in the castle...which in fact was the orange, accented man looking at pictures of himself over and over. It was obvious that Megha was going to have to introduce herself to Logan. She thought that extreme perkiness was in order. "He-loo, Logan! My name is Megha Malhotra! My name spelled backwards is Ahgem! I have heard no-thing about you except that you work with my dear-est, bosom friend," said Megha in a sing-song voice.

Before Logan could respond, Jessie's phone beeped again. She put back her lighter, which she had been clutching, and looked at the phone. Two missed text messages, both from Raj. The first one said that the tracking device that he had placed on Megha had shown that they were in the evil Sher Not's lair, though this time, Sher Not didn't have any connection to the killings, he just liked to kidnap random people.The text went on to say that there had just been a teleporting device activated on the phone and she and whatever she touched would be sent back to the airport to meet the real Lorraine Hodges and get the mission back on track. "The meddlesome CIA, " thought Jessie to herself. The next text message was intended for Megha, whose phone was dead (who knows how long Megha would have looked at it) and it said that Raj loved his little rain cloud, and missed her more every second, and that he would love her till the day he dies...and that the only reason that he didn't kiss her goodbye was because he wanted to be sure that the adhesive on the tracking device he put on her scalp would dry completely so it wouldn't fall off. There was more mushy business, and Megha read and reread the text like seven times. Jessie finally snatched the phone, contemplated leaving Logan there to rot, but settled for Megha standing between them. The all held hands and Jessie pressed the teleport button.

In a flash, they were back in the airport, and reappeared in the women's washroom. Logan, uncomfortable in a washroom setting that didn't contain urinals, left the bathroom and said he'd meet them outside. Jessie and Megha took some time to freshen up. Jessie turned to Megha and whispered obsessively, "Ohhh, Megha! I don't know what came over me in there! I totally freaked out at Logan. I mean, I just get so nervous around him. And he's my boss,well sorta, I mean, I'm still in training, ugh, stupid, stupid," Megha resisted the urge to tell her how funny she thought it was. Before Megha began her consoling, she noticed two feet under a stall with the door closed. Her eyes widened, and she silently pointed to them, and she and Jessie left the bathroom as quickly and quietly as possible.

Meanwhile, in Sher Not's castle, Sher Not was still sitting at his computer, oblivious to the fact that his recent catch had flown the coop. He just sat there muttering to himself, "dead, alive, dead, dead, alive, alive, dead, alive, dead, dead..."

Chapter 5: The Momentary Hero Wasn't Even Well-Dressed...Fashion Irony At It's Best!

Megha was determined to help her man find his man. A million things ran through her head while she glanced out the window as Jessie was driven away. Jessie had almost disappeared into the rain when the car's right tires went up over the sidewalk, quickly recovered back to the road, and kept on their way to the airport. Megha, being such an analyzing-detail person (but not like obsessive, like she liked doing it, and it didn't really take that much time or effort) had a bad feeling. Jessie's driver, Christopher Fraser had a driving talent that one could easily equate to his stunning, and oddly alluring work ethic, and he never went off the road. Ever. Megha sighed, grabbed her yellow Walt Disney World poncho, and ran out the door.

Meanwhile, Jessie was waiting the the car. Her driver, who had a sick, scratchy voice, had just taken his third bathroom break. She decided to make the most of her time and began to decide what cut of wedding tux would most compliment Logan. Before she had the perfect tie and cuff links matched (a mint leaf theme), the driver was back. He was just about to get back in the car when a flash of yellow bounced off the hood of the car and fell to the ground in a heap. Megha regained consciousness within milliseconds and grabbed the driver and yelled "Over heeeeeeeeere, boys!" Out of nowhere, local policemen came running, choked on their doughnuts and stopped running. Then they took turns giving each other the Heimlich. As the suspect was pelted with half chewed food stuff, he snatched up his designer JLo sunglasses and ran off into the mist as fast as his little legs would carry him...snickering. In the distance, his snicker was joined by another louder, more hearty snicker and the police finally started chasing the shadows.

Megha, not worried that the little man was getting away, went over to a stunned Jessie and explained her intuition. Then she went on to explain how she truly believed that she and Jessie had a neuropsychological connection and that they used to share a brain in another life- Megha was weird like that. Nonetheless, Jessie knew Megha had an amazing nose for mystery solving and she decided on the spot the Megha should come on the mission with her, as a secret accomplice, at all times hidden from Logan. Plus then, if Jessie had any relationship questions/ problems/ stresses with Logan...which is out of character but of course a thing that every woman has the POTENTIAL to go through, Megha could help. Megha agreed, and they hugged and jumped up and down.

Then they put their heads together to come up with the next move...

Chapter Three: Coffee and Suitcases

In a Cute New York Cafe

"Wow," Jessie mused as she twirled a curl around her finger, "he really is the best looking guy I have ever laid eyes on...even the spinach stuck in his teeth is attractive...if only I were a green, half chewed vegetab-". She was snapped back to reality when Logan suddenly flailed his arms, and knocked his knife off the table...off the table...and point down into Jessie's shoe. Logan's eyes widened to three times their normal size-which oddly enough, made him even more attractive. Jessie said something half understandable about having steel enforced stilettos, and called him "dude" two or three times (she was still getting used to speaking in sentences around him). He didn't even apologize, but was sad that his knife got dirty and he wasn't done buttering his bagel yet. Jessie officially wrote him off as just a pretty face, and regained her fluency in the English language.

Their coffee date was productive in the way of discussing their new case, however. They read over the infamous Hood's file, and discovered several things about him. First of all, he was the lead in his high school's production Robin Hood, and he never quite got out of his role. He insisted on being called Robin, walked around with far to much makeup on, and carried a wooden sword with him everywhere that he periodically waved around. Secondly, he was last seen in his apartment in New Brunswick (which is in Canada, the land of snowshoes and igloos). Finally, they (Jessie and Logan, who never was told that he had food residue stuck in his teeth) were to obtain him within the month, before his death count rivaled Freddy and Jason's. Their plan of action was to go to the scene of his last sighting and try to decipher, and search for more clues. Their plane left early the next morning.

In a Cute New York Apartment

Jessie went home, booted Raj out of the apartment, and after several minutes of "No, I love you more", "No silly, I love you more" he was finally gone, leaving Megha sitting on the love seat giggling like a fool. Jessie rolled her eyes, and told Megha all about Logan and her case (secret government issues = smecret smovernment smissues), and Megha helped her pack. Megha had some berry good insights. Before Jessie could say anything though, Megha told her about Raj's big news.

Chapter One: So It Begins

Once upon a time there was a girl named Megha. She was very tall and very punctual. While she was away at university, actually at ballet boot camp in Julliard, she met a very special boy. Actually, this was no boy, this was a man. He was also tall, and very punctual. But when they were together, they were short and late, but blissfully happy. Now, this would be the end of the story, except there was another man. Rather, another boy. His name, when people weren't calling him things like "hey, God's gift to women!" was Tristan Green. He had this attachment to Megha, it could be most accurately equated with gum stuck to ones shoe. Anyways, this was really bothering Megha's real man...so much so that he would cry every night. It was his one weakness-Megha. Oh, and the fact that he was allergic to clam shells. That is weak.

So one day, Megha's beau dried his big brown eyes, stuffed Kleenex in his pockets and went to find Tristan. He wanted to discuss some things, share some feelings, with Tristan (as in scare Tristan just enough so he never spoke to Megha again), but he also had a sneaking suspicion that there was more to Tristan than met the eye. He arrived at Tristan's closet and Tristan was no where to be found. He looked under the rug, and behind the door. Tristan had just vanished. Why did this worry him?

A Tall Tale

A fun thing to do over email is to start writing a story and email it to a friend so he or she can add on to it. Then you can keep going back and forth until you have a really great story. Megha and I did this very thing shortly after we graduated high school and we'd like to share it with you. We are going to take turns publishing the chapters that we wrote on our blogs. So, the first chapter is here, but chapter 2 will be on Megha's blog, and so on.

Please keep in mind:
1. this story is all in fun
2. there may be an inside joke or two
3. we hope you enjoy it

I am Canadian

Skating on a frozen lake is beautiful! This afternoon was perfect for it, because the sun was shining, so the ice sparkled. As I was skating along, a train went by. The driver whistled at me and I waved to him. Then I tried to race the train, but I lost. I'm a pretty amazing skater so I don't know how that one happened ;).

One of the moments that I truly felt Canadian happened a couple years ago. That was when I played a spontaneous game of hockey on a little frozen pond with a bunch of people, most of them I didn't know. It was a great group cause there were people of all ages playing together. We played for a long time, until it got dark. I think that every Canadian needs to play hockey on a lake. It's important.

Jessica

Here's what I found when I looked up my first name. My name was first used as the name of Shylock's daughter in The Merchant of Venice by Shakespeare. It is a Hebrew name. The most accurate meanings are "Wealthy one" and "God sees".

This is my new favourite website. There are ringtones on this site that have my name in it and they are so funny! If I ever move out of Canada, I will download one the second that I cross the border.

http://www.babynamesworld.com/meaning_of_Jessica.html

Happy Valentines Day!

I helped hand out free roses to the ladies in Sheriff Hall today. It was really fun to make so many girls smile! For some of them, it really made their day. The card on it said: "You are beautiful! God loves you and he created you with value and worth." It was such a simple message and I really pray that someday, or even today, it would mean so much more to each of them than the roses do. It was funny to see how guys would come up to us and ask for a rose to give to their girlfriends. I bet at least one guy took the tag off and pretended that he bought the rose himself :). That's okay, I can forgive him in the spirit of Valentines Day. It was also cute to see all the guys who came into the building with big bouquets to give away.

Here's what the different rose colours mean (I was wondering about that as we were handing them out):

Red roses are for love and romance.

Pink roses are for love, admiration, appreciation, and gratitude.

Yellow roses are for friendship, joy, and to say "get well".

White roses are for purity, innocence, weddings, sympathy, and spirituality.

Orange roses are for desire, passion, and enthusiasm.

Lavender Roses are for enchantment, wonder, and love at first sight.

My final thoughts on Valentines Day:

1. I support it, though I don't think you should have to spend a lot of money on extravagant gifts.

2. I think that chocolate is a nice addition to a gift, but not a big box of chocolates. You don't want either person to feel fat after feeling compelled to eat a lot of chocolate because it's in front of him or her. I have very little self-control when it comes to chocolate.

3. I don't know if I think that the best type of flowers to receive on Valentines Day are roses. Roses, or a single rose, would be nice for the first couple Valentines Days in a relationship. I'd like to think that I would want to spice it up with another kind of flower after awhile...

Shake It

WARNING TO STUDENTS: While the author attempted to follow Shakespeare's plots as closely as reasonably possible (for parodies), you should not rely on these scripts in a cheesy attempt to avoid reading the original works, while still hoping to pass your examinations. Without limiting the foregoing, please be advised that in the original works by William Shakespeare, Ophelia is not a conniving gold digger, Edmund and Edgar are not ventriloquist's dummies, and Lady Macbeth does not turn into a man when she says, "Spirits that tend on mortal thoughts, unsex me here."

This inspires me to download a Shakespeare parody from http://www.shakespeare-parodies.com/ and read it in it's entirety!

Later. After my exam.

Valentines Day

Some people used to believe that if a woman saw a robin flying overhead on Valentine's Day, it meant she would marry a sailor. If she saw a sparrow, she would marry a poor man and be very happy. If she saw a goldfinch, she would marry a millionaire.

15% of U.S. women send themselves flowers on Valentine's Day.

The 17th century hopeful maiden ate a hard-boiled egg and pinned five bay leaves to her pillow before going to sleep on Valentine's eve. It was believed this would make her dream of her future husband.

To do before next Wednesday:
1. Get some good bird-watching binoculars.
2. Send myself some flowers?
3. Convince my mom to buy me some bay leaves.


http://www.corsinet.com/braincandy/valtrivia.html

Disappointment

You think that you have finally focused your finicky microscope, then you realize that your eyes are actually just looking at the dirt on your glasses.

The Future is Female

When I was in elementary school, particularly in grade 5, I had gender-equality issues. One day, I refused to participate in gym class because I thought that my gym teacher had implied that boys are better at certain aspects of sports than girls are. I had to go to the vice president's office and she told me that Mr Mayo did not intend to be chauvinistic. I really liked the sound of that word, and I made a mental note to use it in further protests. Around that time, this little ditty that was on the inside cover of the first Spice Girls CD became my mantra. Me and my friends would march down the halls at school and recite it.

"Wonderwoman. This Vibe is Contagious. Feel it, Catch it. It's a Girl's World. She Who Dares Wins. It's a Girl Thang. Come On Baby. The Spice Squad Are Here. What Are You Looking At Boy? Can You Handle a Spice Girl? Silence is Golden But Shouting Is Fun. Freedom Fighters The Future Is Female. Spice Revolution."

Now, I'm quite different. I have no problem admitting that men are stronger than women. Generally, guys are physically stronger and faster. It's true and that's totally ok with me. I was reminded of my acceptance of this fact when I happily stepped back and let Morgan's dad and his male co-worker carry Morgan's mother of a couch up three flights of stairs on Saturday. Now, I wholeheartedly capitalize on my physical weakness whenever I can.

I'm sorry, Spice Girls. Oh, and I'm sorry, Mr. Mayo-wherever you are. I will never call you Mr. Mayonnaise again...starting now.

Taste the Rainbow

One pack of Skittles gives you 70% of the daily vitamin C you need.

Goodbye orange juice.